It's been several times when I thought what I would do if we ever met up and saw each other face to face. Sometimes I wonder why there has been such a gap of time. You were someone I looked up to; someone I could come to about anything. Not anymore. When I learned the news of the divorce, I was devastated. That afternoon I laid in my mothers arms and cried. Since then I have placed a guard up over my heart. I have noticed that when I date and get into relationships, I end up dating the wrong guy. I will also end up breaking their heart before they have a chance to break mine. Am I too afraid to let the good ones in? Some people might say that I am, but its been eight years since the news and I am learning that it does not have to be my situation. At first, forgiveness was the furthest thing from my mind. I knew I needed to forgive, but I was so angry with you. However, I can't be this way anymore. I have to forgive and I will. Hatred and bitterness towards you is not an option. I do not hate you. I do forgive you. I hope you can forgive me too.