After Midnight Soundtrack

One of my favorite things to do is go outside, after dark, and walk. Most of the time I take my music player with me, but the past two nights I haven't taken anything with me. Before going outside, I will write in my journal questions and thoughts; what I'm talking to God about. Then I go out the front door and begin to pray. Nothing in my ears playing; all I hear is God's nighttime orchestra.
Last night was great because along with what I was already hearing, a storm was coming close. Lightening flashes, thunder beginning to roll, and every now and then, you feel a rain drop. It was so beautiful. I asked God to let it rain. Either the day before or a couple of days before I remember reading a love letter from my Groom that He would send something to remind us of how much He loved us. Well, I asked for rain. It might sound strange, but I really enjoy the rain. I like how it feels. It feels so crisp and cool. I like how it smells. It smells clean and fresh. I like how it looks. Everything about the rain, I like. So as I was walking, talking with the Lord last night I told Him why I like the rain. When it rains, its like the earth is getting a rinse over; a shower. It has to be cleaned off from all the junk. Well, I thought about my life in a spiritual sense. I need it to rain down and pour on my life and wash away the junk that does not and should not be there. Now, I love the Lord with all my heart, but that doesn't mean that when I got saved that life would be easy and that I would have a free ride to everything. Life is not fair, but God is still faithful. He reminds us in the little things just how much He loves us.

Come Away With Me

To all the Jesus Culture fans you will recognize the title. One of my favorite things to do is listen to Praise and Worship, especially songs that are intimate and prophetic. Songs that really embrace the love that God has for His children. It brings joy to my heart to be reminded how much God loves me. The lyrics of this particular song are:

Come away with me, Come away with me

Its never too late, Its not too late for you

I have a plan for you

It's gonna be wild, It's gonna be great, It's gonna be for me

Open up your heart and let me in

The spirit of God is saying to me, "Come away with me!"

The words are simple, but why is it the act so difficult? Our flesh, maybe. Our minds....how about this? Our hearts.

Our spirit needs to be in tune with the Holy Spirit. He's calling us to come away with Him. He wants us to spend as much time with Him as we can; He has all the time in the world for you and for me. We're always saying how "busy" we are, but have you seen God's schedule? Hello!! Okay so I might be stretching it a bit, but I am only trying to make a point. Our time tables are not God's time tables. He operates on His own time. He has over 6 billion people to take care of and look over; you have how many? He still makes time for you and me. God never says that His next appointment is about to arrive, so you need to wrap it up. No! He loves you enough for you to get everything out on the table.

He's saying, "Son/Daughter! Come away." Don't you want to get away where its just you and God? No distractions of your "busy" life. If God said to me right now, "Sarah! Get in your car and drive. I'll show you where to go!" Honey, you would not have to tell me twice. When it comes to spending some intimate time with God, four things I have handy: Bible, Journal, Pen, and Prayer Shawl. Sometimes God will lead me just to the quietness of my bedroom. He just wants you to come away with Him. You be amazed at how much God would reveal to you if you just got alone with Him. Bask in His presence. Don't try and get out of it either, blessings come and blessings go. Don't miss out on your blessing or on what God has in store to share with you.

Come away!!

Come away daughter!

Come away son.

Come away father!

Come away mother.

All children of God, "Come away! Open up your heart and LET ME IN!"

Woman of Excellence

The story of Ruth is one of my favorite's in the Bible. I've read it seems like a 100 times and every time I find something that just sticks out. In tonight's reading I found this :
"Then he said, “May you be blessed of the Lord, my daughter. You have shown your last kindness to be better than the first by not going after young men, whether poor or rich. Now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you whatever you ask, for all my people in the city know that you are a woman of excellence."- RUTH 3:10-11 (NAS)

Here is how it reads in the message: "He said, "God bless you, my dear daughter! What a splendid expression of love! And when you could have had your pick of any of the young men around. And now, my dear daughter, don't you worry about a thing; I'll do all you could want or ask. Everybody in town knows what a courageous woman you are— a real prize!"

Because of Ruth's obedience and submissiveness, she found favor with God, Boaz, and even her mother-in-law Naomi. Woman!! Grab a hold of this!!! This is NOT a thing of the past. This is even for such a time as this. God wants to make you into a woman of excellence!!! Put Him first!! You want a man of God; be a woman of God. That's where it all begins. 

Ruth could have listened to Naomi at the beginning and went back to her hometown. She would have found a new husband, started a new family, etc. Instead she said, "Do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you; for where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God." Ruth didn't settle for second best. I believe she stepped out of her comfort zone. God had planned and had purpose in Ruth's life. Again, because of her obedience, she found favor. People knew who she was! She was a woman of excellence!!

Someone Special

That someone special
He's a lot closer to me than what I think
He's waiting on me and I on him
The suspense feels like torture
Each day that passes, I know that we're getting closer

I stay true to how and what I believe
Thanking God that he'll be doing the same
We won't back down just so we'll be pleasing

His heart and my heart, we finally meet
There is just something about him
I can't explain how I feel nor what's going through my mind
My nerves are a little shaky
My emotions running wild

What does he think about me?
What kind of woman does he see?
Is he feeling what I'm feeling?

God only knows

He looks at my eyes
I look at his
Instantly we know that we are meant to be
Its not on a gut feeling
Its by the Spirit of God which led us to this place

Only God can do this; not man
God has a purpose; He has a plan

I look forward to our journey of a lifetime together
Lets not forget who did this

My beloved is mine and I am my beloved's.

Music

"Today's music..today's artists...don't be deceived by their messages. In fact most the time, its just better not to listen to that song no matter how cool the beat and/or tune is."

Above is from a status that I wrote just recently on my Facebook. Music is a big part of my life. I'm a singer, a songwriter, and of course a customer when it comes to purchase. In just my CD collection alone, I have over 400 CD's and its still growing.
When I was a teenager I would listen to day in and day out all sorts of music. For example, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Backstreet Boys, NSYNC, etc. Now a days, there is Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, and many more.  Some of the artists I listened to back then are still making music even today. Let me just say, I always have been and always will be a fan of the Backstreet Boys.
The music that Britney and Christina started out making and the music they are putting out now...bug difference. When they first came out on the scene as solo artists, most of their songs were innocent and fun to listen to. They were teenage girls singing about who teenage girls sing about. Mostly boys, love, and broken hearts. Now, Britney has a called "3" and its about having a threesome.
Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" is a song full of deception. Yes, we are all born unique, but God did not create anyone person to be gay. Yes, God loves that person, but He hates the sin. Yet there are millions, if not billions of people all over the world who follow her and help her preach that message that we are born this way.
Why would you allow your kids to listen to these songs?
Why would you, as a BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN, allow yourself to listen to these songs?
I myself still listen to some secular music, but I still have boundaries. I know in my heart what I can listen to and what I SHOULD NOT be listening to.
What I listen to in the secular world is between me and God. The same goes for you. I cannot tell you what you can and cannot listen to, but if God says, "Hey! Should you really be listening to that?" And you say, "Well, probably not," Then its a good idea just to listen to the Lord and your heart.

Lucifer's job while still in heaven was Praise and Worship. Since he got the boot, was fired, and cast down into hell, seems that he gets his messages out in the worldly music.

All I'm saying is be careful what you let your ears hear.
Be careful what you let into your mind.

Beloved Painting

First and foremost, ignore the date. This painting was started and completed on July 21, 2012.

In addition to studying to get my Associates in Theology, I am currently taking a basic Greek course. The language to me is beautiful. The word above in the painting is a Greek word. It reads "Beloved". This particular spelling refers to beloved dearest. That spoke to me.

I can know that I am a Beloved Dearest to my Father in heaven; vise versa, my Father in heaven is my Beloved Dearest.

Early Morning Hours and Its Thoughts

Started writing at 3:39 A.M.

Finished writing at 4:12 A.M.

As I begin writing this piece I see that it is twenty minutes until four in the morning. I am hoping NOT to be up for 24 + hours. A lot has been on my mind; a lot has been on my heart.

Hoping for a change. God is having to teach me that it's okay to pray for myself. I'm constantly praying about and for others. Which is good, but I have needs to and they are just as important. Here lately I've been putting my needs on the back burner. 

For almost two years now, I have been reading a lot. Never used to like it, but now I want to. There is one book that I am trying so desperately to finish, but its like God only wants me in His word and nothing else. Tonight I came across a book that I have by Joyce Meyer, "Battlefield of the Mind". I'm sure that I have mentioned it; most people that know me know that I learn quite a bit from Joyce and her teaching. I was drawn to pick up and start reading the book. Then it clicked, I just need to take things more seriously when it comes to my spiritual walk and needs. If there is negative thoughts forming, then I want to go ahead and learn now how to prevent them and keep them away. 

The mind is a powerful tool. God made it like that. I like how Joyce describes our mind as like a computer and God Himself is the computer programmer. It's funny! I've never thought about it like that. 

Another change I am hoping for is an insecurity I have to go away; I don't want to feel this and I definitely do not want to be afraid of it. Here it is: I like to work out by myself. I will exercise with close friends and other women, but I will not do anything if even one man is present. I am embarrassed by how I look physically: from the shoulders the low waist. Playing sports and walking every night have helped keeping my legs in pretty good shape. So I got me a walking buddy. She and I go walking when everybody in my house has gone to bed. I wake her up at some weird hour and I say, "Leslie! Let's walk!!!" 

Tonight tears came to my eyes as I began walking because for once I felt great about doing something for myself. I want to be healthy. I want to be "sexy" (Well, to whoever my Boaz is)! Most importantly though, I want to be ready for whatever God has planned for me. This includes physical characteristics. He made my body and called it a temple. Temples are strong; they hold up to what they are built for. Temples are beautiful; not trashy and weak. 

Like I said in the beginning, there have been a lot of things on my mind and heart....

 



 

A Healing Start

For seven years I have been struggling with the feelings of bitterness, resentment, and even a little hatred. However, these past couple of months have really had me brewing with emotion for this certain situation. Just recently I went to a concert featuring Josh Garrels. (If you haven't heard of him, look him up on you tube and listen to his music there.) There came up a point where he was introducing his next song "Slip Away". He talked about how a lot of his friends that he and his wife stood in weddings for, separation and divorce were taking place. He described it as like a wave from an ocean. He went on saying that the reason why marriages do not last, whether its because of one person or both persons, the reason is they stop building. Marriage takes work; it's a growing and building process. As soon as I heard this I immediately had an "ah-ha" moment. Now I feel that I can fully forgive this person that hurt me and several other people for that matter. I can finally begin to heal.

My Favorite Things

Everyone has their favorite thing or things to see and do; as do I. Besides spending time with God, family and friends, there are a few things that I just enjoy doing when I am alone.  To be quite honest, I am not sure how many I have. There could be a couple or there could be a lot. I have never actually taken the time to ponder them until now. So we shall see how it all plays out.

1. All my life, I have been involved with music in some form and fashion. I've played in the church band, school band, marching band. I have sang in the church choir, been on the Praise Team, and even in the school chorus. Music is a very big part of my life and still to this day I can not get enough of it. God has blessed me with a gift and I intend on using it for His glory.

When it comes to music I still like to imagine that I am on a big stage singing in front of thousands of people. In fact if I am really getting into it, I'll grab my shaving cream can, hair spray or the vacuum cleaner attachment and pretend that its a microphone. (Actually anything that could pass as the shape of a microphone will work.) I press power on my stereo or my mp3 player and I am in another world. It's even to the point, and those who know me can vouch, but when I'm listening to Praise and Worship I memorize the ad-lib speaking parts from the worship leaders. Pop in some of the old Hillsong albums or even Kim Walker's "How He Loves" and you'll see what I'm talking about.

2. It's a habit that I started when I was about twelve. At night I would walk up and down the driveway. Now if it's too hot, freezing cold, and/or pouring down rain I won't be out there. Anyway, walking in the dark is relaxing to me. It's my time when I meditate and talk to God. I love it especially now because where I live its completely open. It a time when I can pray and express myself to God openly, but privately. 

I will also admit that sometimes I catch myself putting outdoor concerts on for the animals and/or the heavens. That's right! The mp3 player goes out with me. If it doesn't then I hear all sorts of wild animal noises. 

3. Writing is definitely a favorite of mine. I find it to be therapeutic. I can express more in writing than I can just saying it with my mouth. People see and hear more of who I am and who I want to be. Writing takes time; thinking is involved. Every word chosen carefully and placed precisely within the sentence. Each blog has taken its time getting here; even the shorter ones. Songs, I like to write songs. Anything that lifts up and gives glory to God, that's what I want to write about.

4. Painting. I like to paint. There's no need to be perfect with the lines and other pre-coloring details like in drawing; painting you just go for it. Everyone has their own style when it comes to art. My sister, she got the "drawing" gene; I didn't. Still there is something about getting a blank canvas and making something that says something about yourself.

Well, as of now I can not think of anything else. Let me know some of your favorite things to do.

Who I Want To Be... The Best

My desire is to be the best woman of God I can be. Perfection is what I will strive for. 
I want to be the best wife to my husband. Making sure that he is fully satisfied in every way possible.
I want to be the best mom to my children. Making sure they have everything they need and some wants even.

I know that God is molding me to be my very best. He is making something very beautiful.

God can do the same for you. Open up your heart to Him.

It's About Legacy

Today's message at church was about "Legacy". Then when my family and I sat down for lunch my dad asked me a question. He asked, "Sarah, what kind of legacy are your mother and I leaving you?" Of course being caught off guard and not expecting that question I didn't have an answer. I have however spent the rest of the afternoon/evening pondering my answer. 

From the time I was six days old I have been in church. My parents were very much involved and I too would be involved along with my younger sister and brother. Mom and Dad taught us plenty: from right and wrong to staying faithful in what we said we would do. Has it been easy? No... and that goes for both parents and children. 

Some other things that they are teaching us is to work hard. Do your best and give it your all even when you don't feel like it. This, I'll admit, has been a slow lesson for me to learn. They have raised us to fear God and to respect those around us.  This just doesn't go for church either. It goes also for school, work, miscellaneous events...anything we set our minds to do.

I do believe that my parents are leaving a great legacy. My dad not being raised in church, he has come such a long way in the Lord. One thing that I remember us doing as a family was to pray as a family. We would sit in a circle, hold hands, pray for one another,  and other family needs. I know that we are all adults now and we all have busy schedules, but I sometimes I miss that. I have taught myself to pray and read my Bible even when I don't feel like it. We should still make the time to pray as a family. This doesn't mean that we don't pray as individuals, but actually sitting together and praying. I know that's one thing I would want my children to learn and do. 


I want to teach my children and help them grasp the importance of leaving a good, healthy, God filled legacy.

Jesus Wept

The shortest verse in the Bible is John 11:35, "Jesus wept." A significant meaning with just two words. When we find this scripture, we find it the story of Lazerus. He has died and Jesus weeps for him; He weeps with his family. I truly believe that this was a family that Jesus could count on, they would be there. Maybe they even shared some laughs, some tears, jokes, etc. But when I see those two words, many thoughts come to my mind. Does Jesus still weep? I ask this because even though He is now in perfection, His church and Bride is not yet. We mess up. We hurt. We  cry. Does Jesus weep when we weep? So many struggle with sin, does Jesus weep with us when we are sorry. He knows our hearts intentions. When our hearts break, does His? He carried the ultimate burden and that was carrying the cross that would bare our sin and shame. I'm someone that if I get teary eyed, more than likely I will just let my tears fall. Crying is apart of life; its emotion. 
Jesus at one point was human. So therefore He had the physical ability to cry. I know that when we get to heaven there will be no more crying, but does He still weep? God sees my tears. I can't see His, but I know when I do something wrong I hurt Him. It's not like I wake up in the morning planning to screw up my day. I love the Lord and He loves me. 

Boaz

It is my pleasure to introduce to you a man whose name is unlike any other. The character that he possesses is very hard to find in a world filled with greed and unrighteousness. This man shows full potential; he is within the very heart of Christ Himself. Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to introduce to you, Boaz.

We first met Boaz in the Bible, found in the book of Ruth. Let me share with you a few characteristics about Boaz. A landowner, business man. Boaz is known to be the kinsman redeemer. He is well known (famous) in and around his community and more than likely, his state. He is of great wealth. He would help out any one who needed a shirt on their back, needed a meal or meals to eat, etc. He was a giver. Boaz was very protective of whatever belonged to him, especially when it came down to his wife. He even rebuked people that made even one insult towards her.

I tell you this because I can not wait to meet and have my own Boaz. I remember this like it was yesterday, but on Good Friday 2012, at a Ladies' Foot Washing it was spoken over me that my Boaz was coming and coming soon. To be quite honest, since then, I haven't really thought about it. However, it came to my curiousity that I wanted to know who the "real" Boaz was. Wouldn't you? So I researched. Trying to keep myself occupied with other things is not easy, but its also not difficult. God has blessed me with a part-time job that is cooperating with my dual school schedule. I baby sit about once every other week, so you can say that I do keep busy. There is no time to really think about the husband subject. However, he has been on my heart for a couple of days now.

There is only time that I can remember dreaming about my wedding. It was around that I also received the "Boaz" word. I wish that I would dream about the whole day. I even wish when I saw a face in my dream that I could remember his features: like the color of his eyes and the sparkle of his smile.

Oh how I want to meet him.
I want to introduce myself and give a quirky giggle.
I want us to go on that first date that I actually want to remember, instead to regretting ever going out.
I want him to notice me right off the bat.
The minute he sees me, he'll know! And I'll know!
 (I'm getting all giggly right now)
I shouldn't have to ask and question his faith and walk with God.
I want to hold hands.
I want to talk/text/e-mail each other all the time.
I want to snuggle and cuddle with him on the couch.
I want us to pray together.
I want us to minister together.
Where he goes, I go.

There is so much I look forward too.
I am so grateful to God that He would bless me with man like Boaz.
I know God has the perfect timing and everything.
So I will just keep holding on to the promise of God's word.
Boaz will come!!

Face Your Giants

I finally watched for the first time "Facing The Giants". If you haven't seen it, I challenge you to watch this movie. It's about a man and his wife, Grant and Brook Taylor that both believe that God is capable of working miracles, but are becoming a bit discouraged because for them personally it seemed that God was taking His "sweet" time. The husband, a high school football coach feels like a failure; that he could not be his best. He has never had a winning season in the 6 years of being at this school. The dads of these football players have the idea of replacing him as head coach. The wife wanted something that most every woman dreams of having and being; she wanted to have a baby and to be a mommy. On top of all the frustration, Grant finds out that he is the reason that his wife can not get pregnant. So devastation hits and hits hard.

We also meet some of the players, students of the school. One young man disrespects his father. He does not care what he says or thinks, he will do things his way instead of submitting to his parental authority. Then we meet David. He's insecure about his size. David and his dad are new to town and he finds out that the school does not have a soccer team, but a football. His dad, confined to a wheelchair, encourages him to try-out for the team as a kicker. Then we have Brock, the team captain. He displays an attitude of disbelief and of not having any faith in his team or himself.

There came a point where Grant had to give everything to the Lord. He surrendered. All him and his wife wanted was to see God's favor. Brook would awake from her sleep and find that her husband was not next to her, but just over in the living room, down on his knees praying to God. Then she herself would get out of bed and kneel down beside the bed and pray. They knew that the situation and circumstances were no longer in their hands. It would take a miracle!

If you have seen the movie, we know that there is an older man who roams up and down the school's hallway and prays over each locker. As the scenes move forward, we see faith and hope arise. We salvation take place for the students; there's a revival of prayer. We also see Grant and Brook really set their focus on what's really important. They finally come to the point that no matter what happens they will still love God. A motto from the movie: "If we win, we praise Him. If we lose, we praise Him." No matter what you face and no matter how long you face that giant for, you praise God. He will bring you through and out. 

Doubt, disbelief, and fear are just a few giants that most, if not all, human beings have to face. In fact, if you say that you are a Christian, but have never dealt with any of these emotions, you probably need to examine your walk with God. Being a Christian has its advantages and rewards, but its never an easy road all the time. Just like love, peace, and joyous feelings are real, so is doubt, fear, anxiety, and disbelief. The enemy is real, but so is God.

The entire message of this movie is this: face your giants. In the movie, the giants are represented as the big-to-do, rival football team. They have won the state championship for several years in a row and they remain undefeated. The Giants are the enemy, but God gave the Eagles victory. So in our situations, yes, we have an adversary, but its says in His Word that the devil is defeated!! We, in Christ, have the VICTORY!

It's Your Choice

We all have a CHOICE.

We all have to make a CHOICE.

Sometimes the CHOICE is not easy.
LIFE isn't supposed to be all peachy.
The roads and paths we CHOOSE will have consequences.

It's a CHOICE to live in sin.
It's a CHOICE to have premarital sex.
It's a CHOICE to have an affair with another man or another woman.
It's your CHOICE to drink the alcohol.
It's your CHOICE to smoke the cigarette.
It's your CHOICE to over-eat.
It's your CHOICE to use profane language.

You have the CHOICE to serve God
But you also have the CHOICE to hate Him.
You have the CHOICE to forgive yourself and others.

You have the CHOICE to get up and praise God everyday!
You have the CHOICE to read the Bible.
The government can not CHOOSE for you.

It's your CHOICE to get up and go to church.
It's your CHOICE to get up and go to work and support your family.
It's your CHOICE to hang out with the wrong crowd and with the right crowd.


There is a famous saying from an old TV show that goes, "The devil made me do it!"
That statement could not be anymore false.
Satan will tempt you, but he CAN NOT make you do anything.
You have the CHOICE to say yes or no!

CHOOSE this day whom you will serve!
 

LOVE Yourself

LOVE yourself. This can be a hard lesson to learn. In order though to love others, you must love you. So many people I know who struggle with this. Two reason I hear: Trying not to be self-centered and selfish. Second reason: They don't know how to love themselves. Loving yourself does not need to be a cocky and selfish act. The Bible says that you should love yourself. One of the greatest commandments God gave: Love your neighbor as you love yourself. So I'll say it again: In order to love others, you have to love yourself.

I Need You

New song!!

I Need You

by Sarah Huntley

Verse 1

My heart is broken and it is all torn up

Life throws what it can at me until I've had enough

But Jesus said, “Come to me and I will give you rest.”

So Father I pray, help me find your strength.

Chorus

I need You, need You all the way

The path is really long, help me to stay strong

I need you, need you all the time

Don't let me waste one more minute

Without You by my side

Verse 2

People talk and stare at what I've become

They see a woman with lots of hope and big dreams

The would say, “Get up and go and live life your way.”

But Jesus says “Be still and know that I am God.”

Chorus

I need You, need You all the way

The path is really long, help me to stay strong

I need you, need you all the time

Don't let me waste one more minute

Without You by my side

Bridge

My side---- I need You every minute, every second of the day

Put your arms around me, say it'll be okay

I know that You love me, your grace abounds so deep

Still in the midst of it all, then when all is said and done...

Chorus

I need You, need You all the way

The path is really long, help me to stay strong

I need you, need you all the time

Don't let me waste one more minute

Without You by my side

Appreciate the Single Status

I may not like being single, but I'm learning to appreciate it. Life must go on right? So whether or not you have a husband or wife, you learn to live with it. Paul said it himself, he would rather people, especially Christians, be as he was. Now, let's face it...most people have a desire to marry. However, when you're single you have no one to answer to, but God. You can do anything, go anywhere, and life is simple. This just hit me the other day, appreciate your life. God knows what He's doing. He does not need our help. 


The time came when I'm tired of looking; tired of trying. So why not? Do what you want to do. Go where you want to go. Have all the time you need for God. No distractions of a spouse or family. Then when His timing is perfect, that special man or that special woman will come.

A letter I wrote

This is a letter that I just wrote for my future husband. Normally, I would keep these things private, but I wanted to share with you. Here goes:

My Beloved Husband, 

This letter might seem a little different than most, especially with how it begins. Most of my letters to you I try to write as if I already know you. However, tonight is not in that mind set. Also, you'll notice no dates on any of my letters to you, but for today I'll let you know the date and time of writing this to you.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

12:49am-1:11am

Waiting for you is not easy. The older I get I wonder if marriage is even in God's plan for my life. How could it not be? To get married is a big dream of mine. For some reason, I really feel that you'll soon be revealed to me. The desire to know you is so strong and so very real. I keep wanting and waiting on God to let me dream about you when I'm asleep. I'm trying to allow my days not to be where I dwell on the subject, but some days I just can't help it. Sometime I cry; I'll cry myself to sleep. I'll lay in my bed and wonder to myself "when?" There are some times when I seriously think that you are already in my life. If only I knew. However, I know God has it planned. It will happen in His timing.

Here are a few things I want:

I want us to pray together.

I want us to worship and praise together.

I want us to minister together.

I want us to grocery shop together.

I want us to take trips together.

I want us to family up with many children.

I want us to sing together.

I want us to share intimate secrets together.

I don't want to sleep alone anymore. Please come to me soon.

This is written in hopes that you are thinking about me just as much as I think about you.

Know this who ever you are, I LOVE YOU!!

One Desire

My goal is not to sound like a broken record, but I apologize in advance if I do. I speak on behalf of anyone who is waiting. There is always one thing that we so desperately desire; one thing that we can not take our hearts and minds off. No matter what we try to do or what we try to accomplish, that one desire is only still a desire. My question: When God? When will your timing come to pass? God you know our heart. You know that we are not in a relationship with you because we want things...all we want is you...all I want is you.

It is really discouraging though when it seems people all around us are being blessed and getting things that they desire from you. People have their spouse; they have kids; they have their dream job along with maybe a dream income... How many tears will we have to cry? How many more nights do we only dream?

I've been asking what more do you want? God we want to trust you in this department...we do trust you, just sometimes we wonder if that is a path or the path you want us to take at all in our walk with you. So what do you want? We already do our our best at the "basics". We really are trying to please you God. We all love you very much. We would never dream of taking you for granted and/or taking advantage of you. I know that you hear us all.

You have our best interest in your heart. You are our Father. Just like a father, You want the very best for your children.

I love you Daddy God!

They Wait; I Wait; He Waits

As I wait on the Lord I grow stronger! Or what about what doesn't kill you makes you stronger? Out of everyone I know, no one likes to wait. It does not matter what the situation; there is no one who likes to wait. I also know that good things come to those who wait. Well, here is the latest news: I'm tired of waiting!! Is there ever too much waiting? I know that it feels like it. The two questions I ask the Lord a lot: 1) Why? 2) When? Waiting is not fun and if you think it is, you are crazy! It is beneficial. We all know the saying "It's worth the wait." 
The title of this entry is in three parts. Part one: They wait. Family and friends all around me are waiting. Situations and circumstances have really gotten out of hand. Some have really gone too far, but ... They wait on their answers. They wait on the freedom. They wait for the change, if there is to be any change at all. The second part being I wait. Using the same scenarios. I wait on change. I wait on answers. I wait.... Get my point. Now the third part is He waits. He, meaning God. Sometimes, not all the time- not even most, but sometimes I think God likes to wait. He knows it will drive us down here on earth crazy. Then again I don't think He likes to wait. He has planned out every human beings life. However, we have this thing called free will or ability to make our own choices. God does not make us do anything. So when we venture off a bit, He waits for us to come back. Now there are times when He will put His put foot and say it's time to get serious. I know with the stuff I have done, God did not have to wait on me that long. He did though. He is so patient and so loving and so forgiving. I could go on and on. 
No one likes to wait, but sometimes it really is the best thing. It may not seem like it during that time and season of waiting, but when you reflect you become humble and thankful before God. I don't want to keep God waiting any more on me because I decided to do my own thing. I still have to wait, but it really is worth it. 

A Vision: Kids Praise Station

Currently, our theology class is reading Portraits of A Vision. Then on the side I read a devotional by Joyce Meyer. One of the days I read was on vision. The scripture came from Habakkuk 2:2-3, "Record the vision and inscribe it on tablets, that the one who reads it may run. For the vision is yet for appointed time; it hastens toward the goal and it will not fail. Though it tarries, wait for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay."

The Bible also says in Proverbs 28:18, "Where there is no vision, the people are unrestrained, but happy is he who keeps the law." This is how the Message interprets the verse, "If people can't see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves; But when they attend to what he reveals, they are most blessed."

Pastor asked me to pray and so I did. I believe it was back in November when the door was opened to take on a new group of worshippers. Excited I was!! I knew that God was steering me in a new direction, but still allowing me to use my gifts and talents with music. The door that opened was being the Children's Music Director. Every Sunday I lead Praise and Worship with the kids. We have a wonderful time singing about Jesus. It's my job I believe to also start teaching these kids the importance of Praise and Worship. I'm grateful for the opportunity to do so.

Some Sunday's are a little more challenging than others, but it's okay. God never said that it would be easy, but the good news is we never have to go it alone. God is right there through and in it all. Not only that, but we have an awesome support system of leaders at The Lighthouse who love our youth and children. I praise and thank God for that!!

Our goal is branch out a little more with our kids. Children are just as much ministers as grown adults. In reality, kids are not afraid to be blunt with someone. They will tell you like it is. Some of my kids have a parent in jail. I'm expecting chains and bondages to be broken because of the faith and prayers of these kids. I'm looking forward to the testimonies of families whose lives were and are changed because of their son, daughter, niece, nephew, grandson, grandaughter...God WILL use them!!

On average, we have about thirty children. I am thankful for the kids we have. Can't wait to see it grow!! I know that God is expanding and raising up a generation to stand up for Him. 

With children, there is no such thing as fake when it comes to loving Jesus. Their worship is real and it's pure.

I'm Accountable

I look back on my childhood and I already wish I would have treated my family better. My parents, brother, and sister deserved so much more respect than what I gave them. It was not a problem when I was around anyone else, but around my immediate in-home family, I struggled. No one deserved any disrespect. I had a good childhood. My upbringing was right and held high standards. For not showing that respect, I am truly sorry.

I hold dear to my heart the scripture in Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go,And when he is old he will not depart from it." I thank God for this promise to my parents. I'm thankful that I will have this promise.

As a praise and worship leader, especially to children, I believe in some ways I am held accountable for what I do and do not teach them. Even though I am not the parent, I understand that I may be the only Bible they see. It's my job to teach about praise and worship, but it's even more important that these kids hear the about the love of Jesus. Then not just hear about it, but they need to see it. Christ can be seen through our lives; through our actions; through our conversations.

I want to sow into these kids as if they were my own. They are all very dear to my heart. I will teach them what I can and capable of, but parents you must do the rest.

Little Prayer

Tap! Tap! Tap! Is this thing on? Yeah God I'm talking to You! 

Can you hear me? Of course you can. LOL

This so far has been a great year. You are definitely showing up and moving within the lives of those around me. Opening the doors to new and fulfilled relationships to new houses to new lives being expected and on their way. 

We are seeing how much you are faithful to us. 

We experience your greatness everyday that we are given.

Thank you for what you are doing in the lives of those around me. I know that those people love you with all of their heart. Bless them Lord in whatever they do and set their minds to do.

Sermon Notes from Bobbie Houston

These notes were taken on Day 2 of the ONE Marriage Conference at Free Chapel. The speaker for the AM Session was Pastor Bobbie Houston from Hillsong Church in Sidney, Australia. 
The notes are as followed:

• Without family, man alone in the world trembles in the cold.

• Natural family = Spiritual family

• Helps, Compliments

1 Peter 3:1-6 (Message) 

"The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as "my dear husband." You'll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated." 

Also Read Ephesians 5 (Amplified) 

If the splendor of the church was to be measured by our marriage, how would she fear?

• Stay in love- don't forget what made you fall in love. 
• You have to look past the dysfunction.
• Learn from altitude- learn to take high ground.\
• Isaiah 5:1-4, "Now let me sing to my Well-beloved. A song of my Beloved regarding His vineyard: My Well-beloved has a vineyard on a very fruitful hill. He dug it up and cleared out its stones, and planted it with the choicest vine. He built a tower in its midst, and also made a winepress in it; So He expected it to bring forth good grapes, but it brought forth wild grapes. “And now, O inhabitants of Jerusalem and men of Judah, Judge, please, between Me and My vineyard. What more could have been done to My vineyard that I have not done in it? Why then, when I expected it to bring forth good grapes, Did it bring forth wild grapes?"

• Realize that their fruit is your fruit also.
• Learn the art of releasing one another
• Learn to be yoked together. 
• 2 COR 6:14, "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?"
• None of us graduates from growing.
• Redeem strengths; Redeem weaknesses
• Don't make battlefields or enemies over what happens in life. 
• Low maintenance is attractive.
• Try their shoes on every now and then.
• Kids: Choose your battles. Choose Holy Spirit (trust)
• Take kids on journey
• Don't be afriad to say "Sorry".
• Ministry families... keep politics away from your kids. 
• Cultivate the love affair 

Marriage and family is a garden.

Blessings

I am so thankful for the many blessings that God has bestowed in my life. I have an amazing family. My friends are awesome. I am truly loving the church that my family and I attend. Life is filled with many treasures. I'll admit that not every day is a perfect day, but knowing that I have Christ on my side makes the whole thing worth while. 

You Are Who You Are

You are who you are

You are beautiful

You are worth every minute and every penny

God made you special

He made you unique

He made you wonderful

You are who you are

You are strong

You are altogether lovely

You are captivating

You are delightful

God made you special

He made you unique

He made you wonderful

Boundaries or Guardrails?

Listening to Joyce Meyer on the television, her topic is about boundaries or guardrails. In reality it all depends on how you look at it. Special guests were Pastor Andy Stanley and his wife Sandra. Joyce mentioned to them that she does have viewers who are not married, but maybe soon want to be. Immediately I knew that I should tune in and listen carefully. 

We all know the purpose of the guardrail. It's an area where if the rail is not present you could drive. However, it is there to keep you from the edge. Pastor Stanley mentioned that today's culture likes to live out on the edge, but when living out on the edge, you make that one, tiny mistake it will be a disaster. 

In every area of our lives, we need to establish some boundaries. We need to establish these boundaries in our marriages, finances, time, and other relationships. 

The following are not legal issues. They are not sin issues. They are wisdom issues.

Marriage Guardrails

• Traveling alone with the opposite sex who is not your spouse.
• Eating alone with the opposite sex who is not your spouse.

The guardrail conditions your conscience.

Joyce then said, "Don't flirt with danger."

Sandra Stanley suggested that couples pre-establish these guardrails so you won't be blindsided when the issues arise. She gave the scripture from Proverbs 27:12, " A prudent man forsees evil and hides himself; the simple pass on and are punished."


The situation may not be wrong, but may not be wise either. Ask yourself, "What is the wise thing to do?" Again I will say that it's not a legal issue. It's not a sin issue. It's a wisdom issue.


Financial Guardrails

• Tell each other everything you do financially.
  Keep a record of what you spend. 

A good marriage protector is not to point fingers. 


Establish time guardrails. Don't cheat the system. We all are given the same amount of time during the week and every day. Nehemiah 6:3 “I am doing a great work, so that I cannot come down. Why should the work cease while I leave it and go down to you?”

Establish Sexual Guardrails. Ask yourself this question: In light of my past experiences, in light of my future hopes and dreams, and in light of where I am right now, what is the wise thing to do?


You do not have to have a reason why.
It's okay to have a standard.


Proverbs 4:23, "Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life."

Bonded Together Forever!

Tonight was part one of the ONE Marriage Conference at Free Chapel in Gainesville, GA. Pastor Jentezen Franklin gave the opening message. The message was entitled, "Bonded Together Forever".

A friend of mine and I are putting our notes together and creating this blog.

Almost in all weddings there is a unity candle. This candle presents a man and woman coming together as one.

First of all, love at first sight...does not exist. Love always begins in the infatuation phase. The couple automatically see's the similarities. Even though that there are these similarities, we must look forward passed the looks. GO DEEPER!!! One of the key points to me was that you have to have a high standard in the process of dating. Once you have gotten married, you must maintain the fire. Do not let it burn out just because you are married.

Revelation 2:4-5, "Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent."


The 3 R's taken from this scripture are as followed:
1. Remember... the passion for the other
2. Repent... when you were not maintaining the fire
3. Repeat... do what you did in the beginning to get the fire

The unity candle represents the lampstand in your marriage.

There are 3 things that the lampstand provides:
1. Light
2. Warmth
3. Fire

Its takes daily maintenance to keep the fire going.

There are 4 lights that light the lampstand in your marriage.
1. Light of Value

• Value that person God has for you
• Treasure him/her
• Honor one another
• For example, in the book of Song of Solomon: the woman is very hard on herself. She has no self-esteem. Then the man comes along and all of a sudden she is the "lilly of the valley" and the "rose of sharon".
• Also in S.O.S. the man praises the woman 40 times in 8 chapters.

2. Light of Promise

• Better or Worse
• Sickness and in Health
• Death do we part
• I'm not going anywhere
• No matter what happens you stick with that person.

3. Light of Security

•  Foundation of marriage
• Not having to worry, you can trust him/her
• For example, you build a fire, but to keep it within it boundaries to must build a protective barrier to keep it from spreading where it should not go.

4. Light of Faith

• Center of relationship and marriage
• The power of the Holy Spirit.

How you handle your conflict is what could put your marriage flame out?

Lamentations 5:15

Pastor Franklin referenced 4 different types of dances and compared them to typical conflicts that take place during a marriage.

1. Tap Dance: Tap out off the stage without listening to the other person.

2. Macarena: Bringing up stuff from the past, but refusing to let it go...constantly on repeat.

3. Limbo: Low cut downs, harsh words

4. Salsa: angry, possibly violent

Do you want to be right or be reconciled?

Win the argument, but destroy your marriage.

Take the lead in your marriage dance. Someone MUST lead!!!

• Lead in honesty
• Lead in humility
• Lead in asking forgiveness

Every marriage starts as DELIGHT.

Every marriage goes through a disillusionment.

Then hopefully you discover that your marriage has a DESTINY!!!

The lampstand represents the hand and favor of God.

There is a destiny that God puts together with the ONE He has for you!!

Bursting Cloud

I can hear the thunder all the way down stairs. Just having this statement part of my thinking process drew a bigger picture for me. You can gather from the beginning statement that outside my house, a thunderstorm is present. If I listen carefully, I can hear the rain hitting against the tin-metal roof. Having said this and knowing what this book is about there is a picture of a huge, dark cloud in my head. In life you will experience days where you feel good; you feel light and maybe like you can float on air. Then you will have days where the enemy or maybe just people around think they can start pressing buttons. 

 

If you are someone who is very outspoken, you can probably confront the issue really quick. However, if you're like me, confrontation is not the first option. I can not stand having to confront people. I never liked it. I have and sometimes will still allow people to walk all over me; I'll pop that button right back out just so they can push it back in. I would not speak up for myself. At this point emotions and feelings toward certain people and even myself would begin to build up pressure. 

Remember that our picture is a storm cloud. A storm cloud just does not automatically come gray and black. It is formed from the moisture in the air along with other particles. The more moisture the cloud takes in, the darker and possible larger that cloud will become. Until finally, it lets it all out. The downpour happens. 

 

When we let our emotions and feelings build up that pressure life can become difficult or uneasy. We pack it into our minds and find excuses to not want to address the issue. Sometimes we can be dishonest with ourselves and just say, “It really does not bother me. I'll get over it real quick.” I have said that plenty of times and I have come to the conclusion that I deceived myself. Then it happened, I started to notice that I could not hold anything else in. The more days that passed, the more I would hear little rolls of thunder. These rolls would just get closer and get louder until my cloud could not hold anymore. 

 

I have learned that when necessary and done properly, having to confront a person or a group of people is not a bad thing. It does depend on how it is handled. If you think back to stories in the Bible, some, if not most of our biblical leaders had to confront their people, including Christ himself. 

 

So I am going to encourage you to not let your emotions and feelings build up and get in the way. Do not be afraid to face your fear of confrontation. Think about this: The sooner you do it, the sooner you'll get it done. God wants us to be filled up with Him, not with the world.

Letting It All Out

I was recently asked a question by a friend of mine, "Who has told you that you are not worthy?" In all honesty, no one has actually come out and verbally told me, but actions speak louder than words. The church is supposed to be a place for hope and love. We're supposed to reach out to those, but you can't reach out to people on the outside until you can reach to the people inside. If you think you can, then you are not being honest with yourself. Everyone wants to be appreciated. Everyone wants to recognized in some way. Everyone wants to be loved.

I think that the reason most people have insecurities is 1) The devil is out to steal, kill, and destroy. So he will automatically try and put things in your head. 2) People involve themselves in what I can not stand and that is "clicks". I understand that not everyone will have the same friends or acquaintances, but there is absolutely no reason for arrogant and immature behavior. Just this past week a young lady came to where I was and she had made a comment about the food.Well, I began to make small-talk conversation and asked her a question and she ignored me. I felt invisible. In saying all this, I ask you...

How do I come across to others? Because maybe I have done something wrong or offended some of you in some way. However, you won’t tell me. I struggle in my thinking: Not worthy enough, not pretty enough, not thin enough, not funny enough…do you think I’m too weird? What is it? Do you not want to hurt my feelings? Do you even care if I hurt or not? I sit in this guest room and cry.

So what? I have a past. Last time I checked we all have one. Each day that passes another day gets added to our past. I wish I would not have drank that alcohol, or viewed that little bit of porn, or had that filthy and perverted mouth. One day as long as God keeps us here on this earth; I will reap what I sowed. So help me God and get me through it.

I’m afraid to let someone care and love me. I desire it so bad, but then on the other hand I don’t want any part of it. The way it’s been shown to me is that couples are married for 20 something years, then all of a sudden “I don’t love you anymore.” I refuse to be in any part of that.

I’m afraid to become a mother because I know how I treated my parents especially my mother. I wish I would not have said what I said, or did what I did. I’m not looking forward to the day where my son and/or daughter make me cry just because they wanted to see me cry. 

The term I wish comes into play because I know I can never take it back what I did or said. However, I do know that I am forgiven and I am able to move on with my walk and with my life. God has given me a wonderful family. He has blessed me with people who do love for who I am and not what I can do for them. The same also go for my friends, even though there are few, I am blessed. Nothing can ever separate me from God's love or from their love. 

Why God?

Why do we go through the things we go through?
How far does God think He can stretch us?
I know that He said He would not give us more than we could bear, but how much is that?
We're taught to be truthful, but when the truth does come out, why does it get worse?
I thought the truth was supposed to set you free, not still keep you held up in accusations.

I know people who are hurting.
I know people who have feel they have been stretched out to the maximum.
I know people who just want an answer as to why they are going through the things they go through.

How long will they have to wait for their answers?
How long will they have to wait for their victory over their circumstance(s)?

What about our desires? The desires to get married, have children, have a passionate career, etc. Do they exist? YOU SAID IN YOUR WORD THAT IF WE WOULD DELIGHT OURSELVES IN YOU, COMMIT, AND TRUST YOU....YOU WOULD GIVE US THE DESIRES OF OUR HEART!!

Is it really too much to ask?

God! It's only through you that these people have any ounce of strength left.
Why God?
Why have these things happened?
I don't want their answers, but I want them to have their answers.
Make a way when their seems to be NO WAY!!

Thank you for listening God.
I love you Jesus and I know these people love you too. 

Digging A Little Deeper

Life will sometimes throw at you curve balls. You know that you should not swing, but you do anyways. You'll swing and swing til you just swing any more.

Life as we know it would not be life; it would all be boring. So we have opportunities rise up and we have to make a choice. We all know that every choice has a consequence; does not matter if it's good or bad. I think sometimes as Christians we may feel pressure to make life's tough choices. We finally get alone, there will not be no other human being in sight to watch us, but then we remember that God is watching. God is listening. We may forget that God knows our thoughts; he knows our heart and its motives.

Have you ever had to dig a hole? Size really doesn't matter, but after you dig the hole you are tired. You feel the need to rest especially if you are not use to the digging process. That's how life is. Some holes we dig are small and not very deep so therefore they are easy to get out of. Other times, like when we make a bad decision, that hole begins to get a little bigger. The longer we run with that decision, the more we dig into that hole and we don't correct it immediately, the harder it will become to get out.

I wish people would realize that the more you dig, the more spiritually and emotionally exhausted you will become. You come into bondage just because of a hole. One decision is all it takes.

Good news though. God will get you out, but you have to let Him. He will reach down His hand and pull you out, but consequences may still remain. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE wth God. I recently heard someone say that the only way something is impossible is because we make it impossible. BUT GOD...

Audrey Hepburn once said, "Nothing is impossible. The word itself says I'm Possible."

A New Me

When I got saved I became a new creature in the sight of God. My name was written down in the Book of Life. So exciting to be apart of something new. God gave me joy, peace, love....everything I need to make it through this earthly journey, He has equipped me for. However, there is one area in my life where I haven't fully applied myself and that's my health; mainly my weight. I'm a woman who does not mind a little meat on my bones. I have no desire to be skinny, but healthy. God tells us that our bodies represent His temple where His Holy Spirit dwell. God deserves to dwell in a place that is clean. He deserves to dwell in a place that's beautiful, not full of trash. God made me so why would I not take care of His creation. Even though this current body will die one day (hopefully not for a very long time), it's still my duty to preserve and take care of His temple.

I have started a workout routine and hopefully soon people will start to notice. I want to feel beautiful on a daily basis. God tells me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am made in His image.

I'm so insecure, but it's time for that to go.
I hope that when summer comes I won't be ashamed of what I look like.
I hope that when I get married that I won't feel like I have to hide myself from my husband.
I want to feel good about my body.
I believe that in order to really complete God's will for our lives we need to be in good physical health.

So far I have lost 12 pounds. Hopefully more will soon shed. I want to lose quite a bit of weight, but I plan on doing it all the right way. No pills!!! Just watch what I eat. Drink lots of water. Cut out most of the sweets. I am a chocoholic, but I will refrain from having so much. Cutting out caffiene, like my sweet tea from McDonalds. They have the best all around. Anyway, now you know another goal of mine.
I'm starting a small exercise routine, but it will give good rewards. I will NOT beat myself up if I screw up. God will help me. He wants me to be healthy along with my family and friends. Most importantly I want to do this. No one is making me; this is my choice.

Does the world seem bigger than God?

As human beings we become overwhelmed with what the world puts on our shoulders. We carry this weight that is not necessary. There is a saying that says, "The weight of the world is on your shoulders." Well, it does not have to be. In fact it shouldn't be. As Christians, we're told to take up our cross and follow Jesus. We're also told to cast all of our cares on Jesus and leave them at the foot of the cross so that we may deal with them no longer. With all the pressures of this world and the people that it entails, sometimes the world feels bigger than God. Why? Because we can't fully surrender our lives and our will to Him. It becomes difficult to give everything over to someone whom we can't physically see with our two eyes. When will we all learn that God's ways are set. We all know the saying and most of us say it about the elderlym "They're just set in their ways." That's how God is. He is set in His ways. His ways are not my ways, but I know that they are the best ways. They may be seem harder to get through, but its nothing like if we did it all our way. I believe its Elvis Presley who had a song entitled, "I Did It My Way". Do we look back and say that or can we honestly say that we did it God's way?

Psalm 90: 10-17 (NLT)
^"Seventy years are given to us! Some even live to eighty. But even the best years are filled with pain and trouble; soon they disappear, and we fly away. Who can comprehend the power of your anger? Your wrath is as awesome as the fear you deserve. Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom. O LORD, come back to us! How long will you delay? Take pity on your servants! Satisfy us each morning with your unfailing love, so we may sing for joy to the end of our lives. Give us gladness in proportion to our former misery! Replace the evil years with good. Let us, your servants, see you work again; let our children see your glory. And may the Lord our God show us his approval and make our efforts successful. Yes, make our efforts successful!"

I look and read over this passage of scripture and I'm reminded of how much God loves me. His love is unfailing. No matter how many times we feel like we have disappointed God. No matter how many times we fail in our walk with Him; God loves me. God loves you.

In our lives we will feel pain. We will grieve. We will not be fully satisfied, but GOD... God is a God who fully satisfies His children. He fills us up with everything we need. I want God's wisdom in my life. I want Him to keep reminding me of His unfailing love. I have done wrong, but God forgives and forgets. I want to be successful in the will of God. I want God to look at me and say, "Well done my child. My good and faithful servant."

Bible Emergency Numbers

When in sorrow, call John 14
When men fail you, call Psalm 27
When you have sinned, call Psalm 51
When you worry, call Matthew 6:19-34
When you are in danger, call Psalm 91
When God seems far away, call Psalm 139
When your faith needs stirring, call Hebrews 11
When you are lonely and fearful, call Psalm 23
When you grow bitter and critical, call 1 COR 13
When you feel down and out, call Romans 8: 31-39
When you want peace and rest, call Matthew 11: 25-30
When the world seems bigger than God, call Psalm 90
When you want Christian assurance, call Romans 8:1-30
When you leave home for labor or travel, call Psalm 121
When your prayers grow narrow and selfish, call Psalm 67
When you want courage for a task, call Joshua 1
When you think of investments/returns, call Mark 10
How to get along with fellowmen, call Romans 12
For great invention/opportunity, call Isaiah 55
For Paul's secret to happiness, call COL 3:12-17
For idea of Christianity, call 1 COR 5:15-19
If you are depressed, call Psalm 27
If you want to be fruitful, call John 15
If your pocketful is empty, call Psalm 37
If your losing confidence in people, call 1 COR 13
If people seem unkind, call John 15
If discouraged about your work, call Psalm 126
If you find the world growing small, and you great, call Psalm 19

Only A Season

God works in seasons to fulfill a lifetime. 

My season is singleness. I've come to the conclusion that it's okay. Do I still become antsy about the topic? Yes. Almost every day. All I need to do is stay in the Word, close to my Daddy in heaven. Everything will be fine. This too shall pass. There is nothing wrong with being in my mid-20s and being single. If that's what God has planned for now, then so be it. I can not change what God has planned. Plus, I don't think I would want to. His way is the better way. I'll admit though, it seems to be the hardest, but I know that if I would have done it my way, it would all be messed up. So in saying all that, thank you Jesus for this season. You are always there for me. I know that You are preparing me for something GREAT.

Heavy Heart

My heart is so heavy and my mind baffled. Tonight at our ladies' meeting a message came forth about the Proverbs 31 Woman. Great message. One of my favorite passages too. At the same time though, I felt left out. The message was seemed to be directed toward the wife and mother's in the room. I was the only one in the room who has never married and/or who has no kids.

Is it really too much to ask? I get so discouraged and heart broken because I feel like I've been forgotten about.

Whenever I have been attracted to a guy, it never goes well. For starters, most of them act like they don't know me. Then there are others who say, "I just like her as a friend." Then go on to never talk to me. I've had some people try to set me up with a guy, but it never works out. Most of them end up being too good to be true.

What  happened to "Ask and it shall be given...."? I know this to be true, but I just wonder when my turn will come.

People tell me,"When you know, you just know." I want that assurance. Just like I know that I am saved; that I am a daughter of the Most High King. 

Daniel Fast - Week One

It's Sunday morning when my family and I start the fast. Everything was going fantastic. Kids church was awesome. Then after arriving in the sanctuary to only find out the presence of the Holy Spirit was so strong; people all over in the altars praying and seeking. It was absolutely wonderful. Pastor Greg, not getting to preach. God took over and he was showing out. I thought to myself, "This is only the beginning." Keep in mind that my church actually started this fast a week earlier. I was on vacation with my family and therefore we were not prepared to start that week. Anyway...needless to say church was GREAT!!

Transitioning- went home, ate a nice lunch, and took a nap.

BOOM!!! POW!!! I got hit with this awful headache. It was horrible. At first I thought that it might be related to the fast. Within a couple of days before beginning this fast I thought to start weening myself off of certain foods such as sweets and caffeine. So automatically when I awaken with this headache I assume that it is because of no caffeine. Thinking this I decide not take any medicine, it will wear off in a few hours.

I was so wrong. It got worse. The pain did not once back off. In fact, I found myself aching, having chills...this was not good. By the end of the night I have rice pack on my head to try and relieve the tension. It was so bad, lights could not be on around me. I finally go to bed, or at least try, and I still will not take anything. Again I woke up somewhere between  1 and 2 in the morning very ill. Head is pounding, freezing chills, horrible aches, and now to make matters I have a 102 fever. At this point, I knew this was not fast related. That told me flu. Then I thought God does like stupidity. I got up and took some Tylenol. Finally, within a few minutes, pressure began to relieve.

By late Monday afternoon, my temperature reading was 103. This reading fluctuated throughout Tuesday as well. Tuesday, my throat is swollen and I cannot speak. All you would have to do is barely put your fingertips on my throat and you could feel the swelling. Again, HORRIBLE!!

Unfortunately, when you're sick fluids are very important and so are certain vitamins, such as C.  I drank lots of water and orange juice. Then I discovered we have V8. Awesome, because for almost 2 1/2 days I could not swallow to eat or take any pill form medicine. Everything had to be in liquid form. I did eat a couple of Popsicle's...

Good news! God got me through it. I stuck to the fast as best I could.

I tell you this because God knows our heart. He knows our intentions, but He does not like ignorance and stupidity. Take care of yourself. I know I got sick and I'm still recovering, but that did not stop me from praying and spending with God. So in closing, I praise Him for everything that He IS doing. Thank you Jesus!

Vessel

In my morning session with my Abba Father earlier, while studying some passages, I came across this scripture:

Romans 9:21, “Does not the potter have power over the clay, from the same lump to make one vessel for honor and another for dishonor?”

I thought to myself that could preach!!!! Anyway, I started to meditate on this verse and the conclusion that came to my heart and mind was that I want God to make me a vessel of honor. I don't want to be someone He will one day despise and say “Depart from me, I never knew you!”

I am, as the rest of the human race, are formed from the dust of the ground and molded out of clay. Each of us are made differently. My desire is to be the best that I can be for God, my Father. You might say, “How can I be that vessel of honor?” By fully surrendering to Him. He wants all of you and not just pieces of you. We need to understand that God has ALL power over our lives. I know that most, if not all of us have heard the saying, “I brought you into this world, I can take you out!” Well, God can do that. Just like the snap of His fingers, he can smash up your clay lump and say, “I'm done!”

Sometimes I wonder what God is thinking while sitting at His potter wheel. Yes, I imagine a potter's wheel. Does it even go through His mind that he's done tried and tried to make this person a certain way, but that person is just not holding up? No matter how much more clay he puts on to add stability and no matter how much water he uses to smooth it all out... the vessel is just not wanting to cooperate. Have you ever seen a potter work with clay? Or I even remember back in elementary and middle school, we as students in art class making clay pots/bowls. I remember that if there wasn't just the right amount of clay, my bowl wouldn't hold up, especially when it got into the furnace. Then to smooth out all the kinks and try to remove all the fingerprints, I would add some water. I would do so by taking my finger or using a small paint brush. Everything had to be just the right amount. If too much clay was used, then the piece of work would be to lumpy.

When I picture God at His wheel, I see sometimes he's having to add clay and smooth out with water. Other times I see Him having to remove clay because there just too much. There would be no balance. I'd be a lumpy vessel. I would be of dishonor. My God is a God of honor. He will make His children vessels of honor, but only if we will surrender wholly and completely to Him.