Sunday, December 8, 2013

Maybe It's Just Me

I have felt unwanted. I feel like people ( guys) only get with me because they think that they can't get who they really want. I'm not skinny. My body has some imperfections. I've got some curves. My frame isn't exactly small either. I bite my nails. I'm definitely not someone who would be picked out of a line up. Recently I had a dream and the enemy in my dream was my fear that keeps me from telling my true feelings. Oh she was beautiful. Perfect body, skin, hair, boobs, etc. You name it, she had it. 


I have felt unimportant. People know that I have a big heart. In fact I've been told by a family member that my heart is bigger than my head and that I need to balance it out. I have in the past, been taken advantage of. I just could not say no. It breaks my heart to see and know of people who are hurting in any way. 

I have felt unaccepted. On a positive note, I'm definitely a people person. Typically I'm not shy, but I do have a shy side. Here lately it's been difficult for me to plug in. My intention is never to be apart of a click. However, it's all around. 

I have felt forgotten. This one really speaks for itself. Just go log into my Facebook account and see how many times I'm saying Congratulations to people who have gotten engaged, gotten married, who are having babies, gotten their own house, etc. Another positive note, I sincerely mean the congratulations. Then on the other hand, I just want to delete my account all together because well,....you know. 

All these things put together makes me think what have I done wrong. What am I doing differently? Or maybe I've done nothing wrong, maybe it's just me? 

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